The loss of a sibling reshapes our entire lives. Every November, we commemorate Bereaved Siblings Month, a time to bring solace, community, and remembrance to those who have lost siblings. As a result of personal stories, community support, and cultural rituals, this observance is a testament to the bond that remains between siblings -- no matter what.
In honor of those who have lost siblings, this month is dedicated to remembering them and understanding the lasting impact of their loss.
The Unique Grief of Losing a Sibling
Often, our siblings are our first friends, lifelong companions, and people with whom we share our memories and histories. The loss of a sibling can be deeply painful, but often goes unrecognized or is overshadowed by other losses, such as the loss of a parent or child. As a result, Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month exists to raise awareness about this particular kind of bereavement and to provide support to bereaved siblings.
Losing a sibling isn't just about losing the person, but about losing shared experiences, family history, and hopes for the future as well. It is common for sibling loss to disrupt one's identity and affect one's mental health, causing depression and prolonged grief. This is especially true for those who have lost a sibling early in life. Although sibling loss is a long-term and complex process, grieving siblings are often expected to move on quickly or support family members.
As part of Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month, we acknowledge these nuances and challenges, offering a safe environment to embrace grief without judgment for those who have been impacted. Additionally, it is an opportunity for the general public to recognize the depth of sibling loss, increasing empathy and understanding within communities across the globe.
How Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month Began
Losing a loved one is one of life's greatest challenges, and no amount of preparation can completely prepare you for the pain. Despite grief being a natural part of life, the process can feel isolating for each individual. Although friends and family can provide comfort, grieving is an individual experience that often takes time, patience, and support. It is common for people to feel a variety of emotions, including sadness, anger, guilt, and even confusion. Despite this, it's crucial to remember that you're not alone when you're grieving.
In 1969, psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross developed a model of grief stages based on denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. As a result of this model, both grieving people and those supporting them had a better understanding of the psychological shifts one experiences after a loss. As a result of this understanding, friends, families, and even society at large can now navigate and support others through these difficult transitions.
There is also a long history of grief support research. A pioneering study conducted by Dr. Margaret Kiely, a psychologist at the University of Montreal, examined the benefits of bereavement support in 1978. When comparing groups receiving grief support with those not receiving it, she found a marked difference in well-being for those with access to grief resources. As a result of the study's findings, formal support groups and programs were developed to help grieving individuals. In the years since then, these groups have provided comfort and connection to those grieving.
Today, there are many organizations in the United States dedicated to supporting individuals through their grief journeys. From education and resources to creative outlets and community, organizations like the Association of Death Education and Counseling (ADEC), The Compassionate Friends, and the National Alliance for Grieving Children offer unique approaches. In the company of others who understand, these organizations help individuals express their grief and find solace, guidance, and even hope.
Ways to Participate in Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month
It is possible to honor bereaved siblings in many ways, whether it is as individuals, families, or communities. The following are some ways you can make an impact:
1. Tell stories and share memories.
In addition to keeping the memory of their loved one alive, storytelling can be therapeutic for bereaved siblings. Through blogs, social media, or public events, people are encouraged to share their memories of their bereaved siblings. These memories honor the sibling's unique personality and remind others that he or she continues to live on in our hearts, whether it is through a funny story, a beloved photo, or a favorite saying.
People often connect with other grieving siblings using hashtags such as #BereavedSiblingsMonth or #RememberingMySister or #RememberingMyBrother.
When siblings feel that they are not alone in their grief, this type of connection can be comforting and validating.
2. Create keepsakes and memorials.
It is common for siblings to create physical reminders of their siblings. For example, you could plant a tree, donate to a cause that mattered to the sibling, or create a scrapbook. Some bereaved siblings create memory boxes featuring photographs, letters, and keepsakes that represent memories shared. In addition to giving space for emotions that words alone may find difficult to express, these acts are a tangible way to continue the relationship.
3. Take part in self-care and mental health support.
The loss of a sibling can be an isolating experience. During this month, organizations around the world host online workshops, support groups, and therapy sessions for bereaved siblings. It can be immensely healing to be around others who understand.
As a way to foster healing, practicing self-care, such as journaling or mindfulness, or engaging in a hobby with the sibling is also recommended.
4. Attend candlelight ceremonies.
A popular tradition during Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month is candle lighting. By lighting a candle, people keep their sibling's memory alive. While some communities host public candle-lighting ceremonies, others prefer family gatherings. In either case, the warmth of a candle can comfort you, knowing a sibling's memory will always be bright.
5. Participate in community events.
During Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month, many local and online groups host events. These events, ranging from art therapy workshops to memorial runs, provide a sense of community for bereaved siblings. Many libraries, community centers, and support organizations host these gatherings, which are valuable spaces for networking, sharing, and healing.
The Importance of Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month for Society
Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month goes far beyond supporting grieving siblings; it promotes empathy, emotional awareness, and mental well-being. As we shed light on sibling grief, society can break down stigmas around bereavement and recognize that each form of loss is valid. As we recognize and accept sibling loss, we improve open communication and deepen empathy.
During Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month, we all have the opportunity to show compassion toward the bereaved. In support of those around us who are going through grief, it encourages us to ask, listen, and support them. Moreover, it provides education about how sibling grief differs from other types of grief. This observation helps society become more understanding and connected by normalizing grieving discussions.
How to Support a Bereaved Sibling in Your Life
You can offer support to someone who is grieving a sibling in the following ways:
Recognize their loss. There are times when people avoid discussing a loss for fear that they will cause pain. However, acknowledging the loss and the pain it causes can be extremely helpful. It only takes a simple message or a kind gesture to make someone feel appreciated.
Listen without judgment. It's okay for grieving siblings to share memories or simply talk about their siblings without being told to "move on." Make sure they know you're there to listen whenever they need you.
Include them in traditions. The holidays and family gatherings can be particularly difficult for those mourning a sibling. To comfort them, include them in special traditions, or create new rituals to honor their sibling.
Encourage support resources. There are times when offering information about sibling grief support groups, therapists, or events can be helpful. By doing this, the bereaved sibling may seek support at their own pace. Some suggestions include GriefShare or MyGriefAngels.org. You can also find a list of group therapy and support groups in Delaware on Psychology Today.
Be patient. Each person experiences grief differently after losing a sibling. To facilitate healing, giving someone ongoing support is essential.
Final Thoughts: A Month of Remembrance, Compassion, and Hope
World Bereaved Siblings Month is a powerful reminder that siblings are bound together by more than just blood. This observance provides a haven and a platform for those who have lost a brother or sister. During this month, let's remember that we can all help ease the pain of bereaved siblings around us.
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